Difficult Ending = Beautiful Beginning

Well finally! After 2 ruined veins from iron infusions, they have finally listened to me and prepared an IV specifically for my 3rd and finally iron infusion. Iron infusions are not a common accreta practice in most places. The hospital I am at is a research hospital. Every accreta patient (other patients as well) is a trial and error. An accreta sister who delivered here 8 months ago never had the iron infusions, it's a new thing. They know iron wrecks havoc on the veins but they've tried an 18, 20 gauge needle and ruined both veins. Today they tried a 22 gauge (24 is a pediatric needle to give ya an idea of how small it is). I'll be back to report tomorrow if the vein becomes ruined. Granted I have sensitive yet stubborn veins, so I'm glad they have me to experiment on to help ease the process for a new mom who comes after me.  I'm locked, stocked and double loaded :)  My forearms have had 11 sticks. They are swollen, red and bruised. If tomorrow's IV is a bus...

When my bags arrived, 2 days after I was admitted, it was like Christmas. When I opened up a bag from a friend and saw snack foods, I was thrilled! Finger nail polish, candy and pics of my kids! I rummaged through my purse, the pit of endless everything's, and found tape. I felt so loved and taken care by God and my friends. He knew what I needed :) As a result,  My wall of love and support. Pieces of my family, pieces of my friends, pieces of home. And I have pretty finger nails and toe nails, not to mention my own clothes!  The nurses are fantastic! This morning a tech came in and her sweet chatter and face splitting smile was a great way to wake up this morning. Waking up smiling and laughing despite my situation is such a blessing. My tech, Krystal, said she was going on a Starbucks run and asked if she could get me anything. I about flew up out of bed with excitement, literally! This little bit of comfort, familiarity, friendliness, selfless act by a stranger an...

There is more but they are on disk. I'll get them up when I have access to a computer. For now here's some :) 

My sweet friend, Jessica, sent a book to the hospital for me to read. I open it up and there it is: "We are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." Ephesians 2:10 I truly believe The Lord has great plans for me by putting me in this situation. He has lead me, faithfully, lovingly. He's been so attentive, so patient and has helped lead me to the people who will physically embrace me, listen to my worries and uncertainties. He's lead me to people who have given me beautiful memories, spiritual food and an abundance of selfless acts of kindness.  The Specialists He's placed on the team to care for me is jaw dropping. I'm in awe of His over flowing, ever present, extremely active, involvement in my life. Me of all people on this planet. He has made me feel like His purpose for me is much greater then any fear I may have. Since being in Houston, I haven't had time to dwell on my fears, He...

We'll on Monday contractions were every 12-7 min apart. Took a shower, spaced to 20 min and ouch! Called the dr headed in. I was contracting every 6 min. I didn't think it was anything so I didn't bring my bags. Accreta sister, bring your bags, period. I miss my pillows, my clothes, my deodorant...you get the idea :) . They gave me 2 steroid shots for the baby's lungs and they hooked me up to magnesium sulfate. I've been on mag for 36 hrs. Contractions tapered off from 1-4 an hr. Some are pretty painful and cause cervical pressure. They turned off my mag and now I'm waiting to get my catheter out, get on my feet and eventually shower! In the meantime :) : Some people hate these compression boots, I like them.  Yeah, it was a long night....that's all I've got say about that...oh and 4th times the charm when hitting my veins.  My mag. Some people hate this stuff. It actually treated me well. No complaints. I'm so glad. All this stu...

Another appt. I'm seeing a trend after my appts. My day ends up being a bit overwhelming, emotionally. But we are making way to our beautiful beginning! I saw Dr Fox again today. I signed my consents today. It's in black and white..." Pregnancy with morbidly adherent: Placenta accreta/increta/percreta" Below that several paragraphs with risks, complications, what they are going to do during surgery, etc.  Next week I start iron infusions in hopes of boosting my iron levels. Once admitted  they will put a line in an artery in my arm and take blood from me every 3 days. I have 3 people signed up to donate their blood for me, one is my husband :) . He's a great guy :) .  My uterus was irritable so they hooked me up to monitor and of course all was fine. I was scolded for neglecting the 2 hrs of Braxton hicks contractions I was having a couple evenings before. I'm so conditioned to shrugging these normal occurrences off. I forget how fragile my situation i...

I'm here, settled at a friends house in Houston. I'm thankful for them. Opening up their home and ultimately their life to me. They are such pure, gracious, God-loving people. The Lord has provided for me in so many ways. Since leaving my children, He has journeyed with me here. Sounds cliche but it's true. It's hard to explain. I don't pray as often as I should nor do I look to Him or seek Him like should. Seek! That's it! He has sought me out and is walking with me, every step! He knows I'm weary and heavy burdened. He knows my heart is so full of worldly emotions, those of which the bible tells us to cast on Him. But I can't shake the sadness, the worry, the depression of my condition, the emotionally draining, ever present loneliness that I feel without my children and now my husband. The Lord knows this! He's walking with me, carrying my yoke, helping me to carry my burdens, my cross. I'm so thankful I have my blog to share my thoughts so th...

Me and my little inutero companion :) Yesterday was a difficult day. Moving from place to place is overwhelming to me. Remember my ant hills to mountains post. Something small can look, feel and to me, become huge, overwhelming, suffocating. Being by myself, unsocial and withdrawn is the most comfirtable place for me. It's not overwhelming. It's quiet, I can easily pass the time with little movement or thought. It's strange for me, who is an extrovert, a social butterfly. I love people, I love talking and visiting different places. But the reality is I'm not the same person I was 7 months ago. I'm transforming, surviving from day to day. 5 weeks until admission. I know The Lord will make me whole and beautiful inside and out for His will.  I bought the littles a slide and an activity table yesterday. A fun distraction that warmed my heart and put a smile on my face. I rested well last night knowing my babies played themselves sleepy :) Thank yo...

This is the Galveston Storm Memorial but I thought it was fitting for the occasion :)

Waiting for my ultrasound. Nervous but prayers are abundant. I am thankful. Here's a couple from 2 women I've never met nor do I know their names: "God's hand is on her womb, her team and on EVERYTHING that will touch her...physically and emotionally. To Him be the glory!!!" "Phew. I just read her blog. Oh,Father, bless this mama. Give her strength and endurance. Help her feel Your presence and peace. Make the time sweet yet swift so she can be back to snuggle all her little guys and their new little love. Help her and her husband fall even more deeply in love and for them to be strengthened by this experience. Protect her baby, Father, with lungs developed and fully functioning systems at birth. Growing this little one outside the womb as well, strong and healthy. (Through fierce tears) I pray you give her courage. In Jesus name,Amen." Thank you so much for everyone who is thinking about, praying for us and sending us messages and text m...

The last leg of the journey to TX. I'm trying to parent from a car 1800 miles away. It's not easy. My kids are being so good for my mom. I'm blessed to have such a selfless mother who is willing to jump on a plane (she's terrified too!) and take on my home and 7 children, all by herself. She's my hero :) . People have asked me how they can help me, did I need anything. The answer is yes! I had a sweet friend come today to give my mom a massage, she gave my mother something I couldn't. A time out. Some peaceful, relaxing 'her' time. Time to be pampered, she deserves it. Y'all can do what I can't, help my family. A card in the mail. A picture drawn by a child to one of my children letting them know, they are special, they are thought about and prayed for. A meal made with love and attention, specifically for my children. A meal gift card to get them out of the house and distracted from this burden for a while. Donated toys, my children are not ki...

My husband is pretty awesome. The original plan was for me to fly. My fear and anxiety over flying rendered me physically sick so my husband said he'd travel with me, via, car to TX. I'm so thankful for his job, his work ethic, his love for me. Day I, we traveled from home to Chattanooga TN, 8 hrs. To me it was a really quick trip. Usually I'm wrestling with 5+ kids and playing games, assigning spaces, correcting behaviors, the list goes on and hrs drag by. This time, it's all too simple, I'm enjoying this one on one time with my husband. Last night we enjoyed dinner at a local joint called Community Pie. Conviently, it was located across from our hotel (the red symbol). It was 75 degrees and a pleasant evening to go for a short walk. My husband, a craft beer connoisseur, enjoyed a local Pilsner and I had a slice of pizza. This place was pretty neat, we sat inside but it was opened to the outside. Shaking off the cabin fever has never felt so good.  The kids d...