Small milestones are big!

Gabriel is doing fantastic! No cpap and no IV :) . I got to hold him while he was being fed through his tube and I gave him his paci and he started to suck on it! Such a big boy :). Today he weighs 4lbs 14.5oz.

He's still under the lights but I got to hold him for 30 mins. He's still having Brady/apnea spells but he's been able to stir himself out of them. This doesn't mean he won't need to go back on cpap but for now it's a big step :) .

I'm also being discharged today. Everyday a dr or 2 comes in my room to introduce themselves and say they were present for my delivery. And for the record, 95% of those in attendance for my surgery were female ;) . I'm thankful for this because as women, mothers they understand the position I'm in in loosing my uterus by default of circumstances, not by choice. There's a huge difference.

Today I'm a bit more emotional but I imagine this is expected as well as probably get worse over the course of recovery. I found comfort in knowing I was only 3 floors up from my little guy. For now Roger and I will sleep at a friends house until our temporary apartment comes available but will stay with our baby throughout the day. We can stay in the baby's room but I fear loosing too much sleep which will impact my emotions more, increase my stress level and hurting my supply. Soon enough Gabriel will be nursing and I'll have to stay there 24/7. If it's too hard for me to be away I can always stay. I'm thankful we have options :)

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Ant hills to mountains

First I have to share the love and support from all over. Especially to Hope for Accreta Foundation, Gina. She sent me this. Such a beautiful surprise to see the signatures of survivors from all over the world. Very humbling. Probably the biggest and most humbling gifts I've received thus far are cards with words of encouragement. I've received birthday cards, etc but these cards are different...or maybe my perspective is changing. This past week I don't look at my children the same. When I hold my youngest, I inhale his sweet, sticky and sometimes unidentifiable (depends what substance he's sporting) smell. I look at my two youngest and truly look into their deep blue eyes, trying to count the various shades of blue. I watch their movements. I stare in wonder how my 3 yr old knows almost all the words to Frozen, complete with hand gestures and facial expressions. How observant she is...what has she observed from me over the 3 short years of her beautiful life? W...

Reflections from the last 8 weeks

Galveston, TX Pavilion for Women Texas Childrens The day after Easter when I was admitted for preterm labor. My Iron Man Emergency surgery 5/8/14. The team was assembling. PAIN! But alive! First time holding Gabriel First night without the NICU, a hotel on the way home.

Some things to think about

When "counseling" us on vbacs, OB's usually always reference to uterine rupture. But do they tell you that with 1 c section we have a .24% of developing accreta. Or a .57% chance after 3 c sections...or a 2.33% after 5 c sections. I'm guessing by the time one reaches 3+ sections, the vbac talk is non exsistent. When deciding between a vbac or rcs (repeat c section) we need to ask ourselves "will there be future pg(s)", "is there permanent birth control in place?" Keep in mind, yes there was a study done in this, 49% unplanned pregnancy rate! (Per CDC 2012, Guise 2012) Women have a 6.4% chance of placenta previa after 1 c section according to a study done by Silver 2006. And if you have previa your chances dramatically increase for accreta. 3.3% (1 c/s), 11% (2 c/s), 40% (3 c/s) and levels off to 67% with 5 or more sections. Now if your chances for uterine rupture are .09% to 3.7% which carries a 5% maternal death rate, one would say h...

Difficult Ending = Beautiful Beginning

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